By: Rohit Brijnath
First published: 15 April 04, TODAY

There is something tacky and tasteless about the revelations of David Beckham's alleged extra-marital affairs, which is probably exactly why so many people are riveted by them.

Of course, the athlete as victim is always hard to swallow. As much as we worship them, we are somehow never that unhappy when they get their comeuppance. Envy evidently is a terrible thing.

Usually incidents involving athletes and women need to be taken seriously, though that is unfortunately not always the case. In recent times, there has been a multitude of cases of women alleging rape by sports stars in England, Australia and America, but some of the responses have been alarmingly flip.

After recent allegations of sexual assault against Australian footy players, a TV commentator said he was waiting for the season to begin so they could put all this behind them. As in, let's play, dudes. That some of these women will never be able to put their trauma behind them was glibly passed off.

It is all quite unspeakable, yet players often choose to stay silent about their peers (surely true courage is reporting a criminal team-mate), or blithely put the blame on "groupies" as if it is somehow their fault. It is not. Being rich and famous is no excuse for not knowing the difference between "yes" and "no".

Of course, the Beckham case is quite different.

It alleges no criminal activity, but is merely an exercise in the lurid and an opportunity for brief notoriety for his accusers. Alas, women who have truly been subjected to terrible abuse from athletes have been pushed off the pages by cheap gossip.

The Beckham-style scandal is hardly new. Every now and then an athlete will wake up to front-page headlines of an affair he would rather not remember. "Oh $%&^" is usually the first response. At this point, he will think of his wife and then of his image, though not necessarily in that order. Spouses may forgive, but sponsors may not.

For publicists and tabloids, who have each other on speed dial, this is the ultimate story. Sex sells. If it involves a superstar athlete, even better. If it includes a superstar athlete, who claims he's merely a pope in boots, then circulation simply flies.

And it is about circulation, right? No, apparently it's about some greater good!!! That is to say tabloids are truly worried about the absence of role models, anxious about the rate of adultery in England, and insistent on cleansing the nation's moral fabric. Yes, and I'm Janet Jackson.

While adultery is not necessarily to be encouraged, it really is none of our business.

How Beckham conducts himself as a footballer is news. Whether he wears Victoria's secret underwear, enjoys sitting in a bath filled with $20,000 wine, or likes his girlfriends to coat themselves in mint chocolate is something I'd rather not know. Not everything in life must be reduced to a Jerry Springer show.

But there appears to be no finish line to the tactless and the offensive, and there is no better example then the continued disclosures of Princess Diana's love life. Exploiting a young troubled woman after her tragic death is testimony that "civilisation" has passed some people by.

The purpose of the Beckham stories is hard to fathom, and sleazy seems a reasonable definition (for both parties).

Rebecca Loos, who sparked the frenzy, has reportedly been paid £300,000 ($907,000) for her newspaper revelations and another £125,000 for a TV interview. If it was an expensive dalliance for Beckham, it is evidently a rewarding one for her.

Ms Loos' reasons are unknown to me, but Sarah Marbeck, the Australian model, who came in second, is claiming a broken heart. Her prize is apparently A$800,000 ($993,000) for her story. Clearly some broken hearts count for more than others.

Ms Marbeck apparently has text messages, which no doubt are revealing, that Beckham sent her.

This raises two points. First, how could Beckham be stupid enough to send them, though perhaps that should remain a rhetorical question. Secondly, why indeed did Ms Marbeck hoard these messages. No doubt to make herself feel better in times of stress.

A statement released in Australia said: "Sarah is pretty shocked by the level of interest in her life". This no doubt deserves enshrinement in the Naivety Hall of Fame. Did she think David Beckham was a plumber?

Mr and Mrs Beckham are doing their best to be seen together, mostly holding hands. Presumably once indoors this is not occurring. In a way it is all rather sad, but Mr Beckham is not well placed to make any charges of unseemly behaviour.

Eventually, in many such cases, denial is followed by contrition. The athlete will emerge at a press conference, dutifully suited, looking the picture of penitence, and issue a statement apologising to his wife. Evidently athletes first learn to manipulate a ball brilliantly, and then dedicate themselves to mastering the art of the mea culpa.

Athletes abuse umpires, break an opponent's ankle, hurl racist remarks, and then they say something along the lines of "it was the heat of moment" and "I have had trouble sleeping since" and "I would be grateful if the media respected my privacy".

Of course, no one, barring those who think The National Enquirer is the gospel, believes any of this. No doubt some of it is genuine remorse, some mistakes truly honest, but we are faced with such a barrage of apologies from athletes that we are now conditioned to view them cynically.

It's really all just a shame.