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With the rest of the world, I grieved over the loss of once-brilliant musical legend Michael Jackson the only way I knew how: I dusted off my Thriller cassette (the first cassette tape I ever owned) to play on loop, flicked through my Dangerous tour book to reminisce about how I was right there along with almost 50,000 others to sing him Happy 35th Birthday, and YouTubed his music videos until my eyes started moonwalking across the room.
And then I stumbled upon The Wiz.
Featuring an all-black cast, this urban musical retelling of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz showcased the then-20-year-old singing and dancing phenom as the Scarecrow alongside Diana Ross' Dorothy.
Although it bombed commercially and was critically panned, Jackson was the only one positively reviewed, with critics like Roger Ebert saying he "filled the role with humour and warmth" and others noting that he possessed "genuine acting talent" and "provided the only genuinely memorable moments".
That's a good review. Which started me thinking: How come the King of Pop never became the King of Celluloid? After all, his groundbreaking music videos were all helmed by the silver screen's best and brightest, particularly The Blues Brothers' John Landis (Thriller, Black or White), Taxi Driver's Martin Scorsese (Bad), Do the Right Thing's Spike Lee (They Don't Care About Us), Boyz n' the Hood's John Singleton (Remember the Time) and Fight Club's David Fincher (Who is it).
You could also say he "acted" with Tinseltown's who's who, with everyone from Steven Spielberg and Richard Dreyfuss to John Travolta and Whoopi Goldberg starring in his 1987 music video Liberian Girl.
Let's also not forget Macaulay Culkin, Eddie Murphy, Marlon Brando and Chris Tucker all having played his "co-stars" one time or another.
But maybe "movie star" just wasn't in the cards for The Gloved One - even if his movie-star ambitions were distinctly apparent in his multitude of mini-movie music videos.
For starters, when you are an international superstar of such stratospheric heights, you simply can't escape being Michael Jackson.
Which pretty much explains why most of his big screen outings following The Wiz had him playing a version of himself. Cases in point: The 1988 song-and-dance fantasy Moonwalker or the Francis Ford Coppola-directed Captain EO.
If anything, at least the guy had a sense of humour, especially evident in self-referential movie cameos like his Agent M in 2002's Men in Black II or bit part in Eric Roberts' 2004 low-budget spoof comedy Miss Cast Away.
His voicing of a fat institutionalised white man who believes he really is Michael Jackson on an episode of The Simpsons, though not a big screen-endeavour, was particularly memorable and further showcased his comedic flair.
So, why didn't he get a movie resume to match his Billboard success?
Perhaps the most obvious answer would be that MJ, by all counts, was a casting nightmare. And it wasn't because he didn't possess the necessary aptitude.
He was undeniably one talented individual, but what role would be available for his ever-changing, increasingly unnatural face? And let's not forget that inimitable high-pitched speaking voice.
Jackson wasn't the first, and wouldn't be the last, award-winning singer who never made the successful crossover into silver-screen stardom.
Yes, some, like Ms Whitney and Ms Madonna, have had their fair share of critically-acclaimed hits and universally-panned misses.
And some, like Ms Beyonce whose lead role in the upcoming Obsessed adds one more notch to her growing movie resume, just about squeak by.
But, well, not everyone is Will Smith.
So, here are our five favourite crossover flops whose stars prove that while they can carry a tune, they unfortunately cannot carry a movie.
It really ain't as easy as it looks, okay?
BRITNEY SPEARS
We have only just one word to say: Crossroads. 'Nuff said.
MARIAH CARY
Here's another one word: Glitter. Horribly, excruciatingly, dreadfully painful. Actually, that's five words but you get the point.
JESSICA SIMPSON
To you, it's a bird with stuffing and drumsticks. But to people in the entertainment industry, it's career suicide.
Yes, The Dukes of Hazzard and Employee of the Month were big honking turkeys for the ex-Mrs Lachey, and yet, according to IMDB, she's still slated to appear in a 2010 movie called The Witness. Hope she's not referring to us - we don't intend to witness it.
50 CENT
While his 2005 "breakthrough" movie Get Rich or Die Tryin' was a competent attempt, you really couldn't call that glamourised semi-autobiographical character real "acting".
His subsequent choices, including Righteous Kill, silly spoof Date Movie and this year's Next Day Air (he was even bad in the trailer) just proves - due mainly to his having the screen presence of mouldy toast and acting ability of a doorstop - that not all rappers-turned-actors automatically find success like Will Smith did.
RINGO STARR
The Beatles may have collectively spawned many a successful tailor-made musical movie, but it took only one of the Fab Four to rack up a truly embarrassing B-grade film resume all by himself.
With films titled Sextette, Son of Dracula and The Magic Christian, he hit an all-time low with the unbearable prehistoric fantasy film Caveman - a flick so bad, you have to see it to believe it. Makes you wonder how much hallucinogens the man inhaled back in the day.
- TODAY/yb
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