Fatal child abuse: The crime of standing by and why mothers let their children die

SINGAPORE: A five-year-old boy is scalded to death after months of abuse by his parents. An 11-year-old girl is assaulted by her stepfather until she succumbs to internal injuries. Another five-year-old girl is routinely punched by her martial arts-trained father, until she dies in the toilet.

These are not just horrific stories – they are cases from Singapore’s courts in recent years depicting disturbingly similar scenarios – one parent or step-parent abuses a child while the other allows it, or even joins in. Eventually, the child dies.

In January 2020, as part of sweeping reforms to Singapore’s Penal Code, a new offence came into force: Section 304C – for causing or allowing the death of a child aged below 14, or a domestic worker or vulnerable person in the same household.

In cases that have come before Singapore’s courts involving the deaths of children, the parent who allowed the death was overwhelmingly a woman. What is the family dynamic in these cases and what can women in similar situations do?

HOW DID SECTION 304C COME ABOUT?

In a report released in 2018, a committee tasked with reviewing the Penal Code noticed a spike in prosecutions of fatal abuse of vulnerable victims, with at least five such cases in the courts between January 2016 and December 2017.

This was a sharp rise from the seven cases of fatal abuse of vulnerable victims prosecuted from 2000 to 2011.

The committee studied local cases and found limitations in the existing legal framework at the time: Lacunas or gaps in scenarios where it was unclear which injury caused the victim's death, or where it was not clear which of the abusers actually caused the death.

There were also fatal abuse cases where the caregiver did not intend to cause the death, and so was not prosecuted under offences adequately reflecting the heinous nature of the crime.

Most cases had a history of abuse, and the death could have been prevented with earlier intervention, the committee found.

When introducing Section 304C in parliament along with a slew of other reforms, Minister for Home Affairs K Shanmugam referred to the case of Daniel Nasser, who was two when he died after being abused by his mother and her boyfriend.

Mr Shanmugam said Section 304C is intended to address situations where two or more people were in a position to cause the victim's death, but both deny it.

In such cases, it could be difficult to prove who committed the abuse and who allowed the abuse to happen, and the law as it stood then meant that both people could be acquitted.

However, Section 304C enables all such offenders to be convicted, even if it cannot be proven who specifically had carried out the abuse leading to death.

Before the law was introduced, there were existing offences specifically criminalising the abuse of children and vulnerable victims. These came under the Children and Young Persons Act.

The Ministry of Home Affairs said one person has been convicted since Section 304C came into force – Roslinda Jamil, who allowed her 11-year-old daughter to be killed by her spouse.

One case was reported in 2022 and another in 2023, and these cases are still pending.

The penalties for Section 304C are jail of up to 20 years and a fine or caning – the same punishments as those for culpable homicide not amounting to murder.

Children are dependent on their parents to protect them, Deputy Chief Prosecutor Hay Hung Chun told CNA. So parents are punished for allowing harm to be inflicted on their child when it was within his or her ability to prevent it.

"It is also to show society's disapprobation for such parents who fail in their basic duty to protect their vulnerable and defenceless children," he said. 

The "wider purpose" is to deter potential child abusers and protect more children.

"Deterrence is an especially important consideration for such cases of intrafamilial abuse, as the difficulties in detecting and preventing such abuse may allow the abuse to continue over a sustained period of time," he said.

"This may result in an accumulation of injuries with grievous, or even fatal, consequences."

WHY WOULD A MOTHER ALLOW HER CHILD TO BE ABUSED?

Women in such situations are very often abused themselves, experts said. They could also have existing disorders or past trauma, or are caught in relationships where they may feel powerless to effect any change.

Ms Nazeema Marican, a 34-year-old social worker at PAVE, an organisation that helps survivors of abuse and domestic violence, suggested several possibilities.

The women may fear that taking action could lead to further violence or retaliation against themselves or their children. They might also be subject to emotional manipulation, and think that they are responsible for the abuse or that they would lose their children if they reported the abuse.

Ms Nazeema said abusers often isolate their victims, making it harder for them to seek support and protection.

"One of the biggest worries that a survivor has about reporting the abuse is that the children may be removed from the family by child protective services," she said. 

"A survivor may also worry that reporting the abuse may affect the family dynamics and relationships, worsening the family situation."

Director of advocacy, research and communications at women’s advocacy group AWARE, Ms Sugidha Nithiananthan, said many women are also financially dependent on their abusive partner, making it difficult for them to leave the relationship.

"Oftentimes, domestic violence enacted against children is an extension of the abuse that their mother is already facing," she said. 

Women may also be in a state of denial, "a psychologically incapacitating state that some mothers experience when faced with the possibility that their child is being abused", said Ms Sugidha.

Dr Christopher Cheok, chief of forensic psychiatry at the Institute of Mental Health, said years of spousal violence could result in "learned helplessness".

Cases he has seen in his almost 20 years of practice typically have a domineering perpetrator and a spouse who is "not so empowered".

The passive spouse may have a personality where they do not dare offend the perpetrator or have an overwhelming fear of losing their partner. The perpetrator may have also deliberately chosen a less assertive partner they can control.

In other instances, the spouse may not even have been abused by the perpetrator, but were themselves abused as a child. This early childhood violence may have caused them to seek out partners "who are not the best for them". 

"So they may have actually been subjected to many cycles of violence even before they met the current spouse and they themselves may be having substance abuse issues themselves as well," said Dr Cheok. "So sometimes the spouse already has their own personal issues to deal with which can be very complicated, (and) many times revolve around trauma."

Dr Cheok said he has seen an unusual case where the spouse, a victim of child abuse herself, felt she had to reform the perpetrator – due to a subconscious need to reform her own father.

"So it's like a saviour complex. They feel that they couldn’t save their mother, now I can save my partner."

On why it is typically a woman who is the passive spouse allowing the child to be abused, Dr Cheok said the vast majority of inmates in Singapore are men. The majority of substance abusers are also men – a major risk factor for domestic violence. 

More full-time caregivers and homemakers are women, so the economic imbalance is already there, said Dr Cheok. Men are also typically physically stronger.

"Sometimes it has to do with their ability to stand up for themselves or to stand up for their children," he said. "The truth is that – if they did stand up for themselves or for their children, they wouldn't have found themselves in this position to start with."

Asked if the passive partners are aware that they should not allow the child abuse, Dr Cheok said: "I think in the initial few episodes of serious abuse, the caregiver kind of knows.

"But after many years of doing things, they use their own psychological defences to explain their way out of things. So sometimes a person may say that 'Oh I know that what my husband did was very extreme and my child is crying and hurt. But the child shouldn't have been so naughty. He brought it upon himself,'" explained Dr Cheok.

CAN SOMEONE BREAK OUT OF THIS CYCLE?

Passive spouses caught in domestic violence need a lot of help to break out of the cycle, said Dr Cheok. These include taking steps towards financial independence and social support whether from friends, family, social workers or mental health professionals.

The help can also come from the legal system, where a person can enforce personal protection orders and domestic exclusion orders.

Caregivers also need help to understand the harm done to the child.

"Many of them understand the physical violence leading to effects on the child, but sometimes they don't understand the emotional trauma and the impact of emotional trauma on the child," said Dr Cheok.

"Next is to ask them what keeps you in this relationship? Because I mean from an outsider's point of view, they will give you a very simple reply – just leave the fellow, it's so easy," he said.

"Sometimes they may say they still have a mortgage to pay up, they are alone in Singapore. Sometimes if they have hesitancy to make a report or to stand up for themselves it's trying to help them understand what they can do to empower themselves to at least defend their child or themselves as victims."

If you need help, turn to

• The police: Call 999 or send an SMS to 71999 if there is imminent danger
• National Anti-Violence and Sexual Harassment Helpline (NAVH): Call 1800-777-0000 or use its online reporting form
• Family Service Centre or Protection Specialist Centre
• PAVE Integrated Services, which helps survivors of abuse and domestic violence
• Family Justice Courts to apply for a Personal Protection Order or Domestic Exclusion Order 
• AWARE’s Women’s Helpline or Women’s Care Centre