Sex, lies and loyalty tests: Meet the detectives policing modern Indian love lives
Love brings hope — and uncertainty too. As more Indians seek reassurance before and after embarking on marriage, private detectives are stepping in to verify trust and, sometimes, quietly contain scandals, CNA’s Love Auditors finds.
Although love matches are a fraction of marriages in India, they are growing in number — so “love auditing” is a growing business.
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NEW DELHI: When their daughter announced she was engaged, Nitesh and Vandana Sethi (not their real names) did not celebrate.
The heiress apparent to their family fortune had fallen for a man they barely knew and about whom they had heard troubling rumours. Their objections were firm. Hers were firmer.
In India, marriage is rarely just a union of two people. It is a strategic alliance between families, so arranged marriages remain the bedrock of Indian society.
While love marriages are growing in number, they are often seen as an act of defiance and lacking the safety net of family vetting. So parents like the Sethis are turning to private detectives to fill this gap.
One such firm is Sleuths India, run by husband-and-wife team Naman and Nidhi Jain.
“We can’t predict the outcome of any case. But as far as I could (gather from) them,” says Naman, referring to the Sethis’ case, “I found … the boy to be a little fishy.”
Premarital background checks now form the bulk of the agency’s work. What began as a handful of cases two decades ago has ballooned to close to 200 investigations a month, he shares.
The process is exhaustive. Detectives examine financial history, employment claims and lifestyle habits, including smoking or drug use. “Whatever he does, wherever he goes,” Naman says, “we’ll collect … videos as evidence”.
The agency adheres to the letter of the law, the investigators say. Yet their methods often fall into an ethical grey area.
In the Sethis’ case, the team’s digital search uncovers a discrepancy in the young man’s residential record. Gaps in his employment history also suggest he may not have been entirely truthful.
The initial doubts are reinforced when the detectives gather information from neighbours, including one who describes the man as a “vagrant” who rarely works. But the findings, handed to the bride-to-be’s parents, fail to sway her.
As a “last resort”, the agency puts his loyalty to the test. A female undercover agent, posing as a newcomer to town, approaches him under the guise of looking for a flat. The exchange leads to a dinner invitation.
As hidden cameras record the evening rendezvous, it does not take long before the conversation shifts. He invites her to go clubbing. He compliments her body. He says he can imagine her in a bikini. Eventually, he suggests she come back to his place.
Confronted with the evidence, the daughter’s defiance gives way to devastation. The engagement is called off.
As more young people seek their own partners in modern India — where family approval still carries weight — “love auditing” appears to be a booming business. CNA’s Love Auditors follows the detectives operating on the fault line between love and trust.
WATCH: India’s love detectives — Background checks before marriage reveal hidden affairs (44:55)
CATCHING SEXTORTIONISTS
Shady boyfriends and premarital checks are only part of the business. The agency is also called in when “love” is used as leverage.
In one case, a businessman, 65, decided to have what he believed would be a discreet fling when a former employee caught stealing from him offered sex in exchange for the money.
But the ex-employee turned the tables on him. Recruiting her husband to help her, she filmed the businessman in a state of undress and then the couple threatened to release the video if he did not pay them US$200,000. He had 48 hours.
“(They think) this man is a vulnerable target,” Naman says. “He has a wife and children. And (the blackmailers) know that if he does anything tricky, it’ll turn into a big problem (for him).”
The businessman manages to negotiate a reduction, buying time while the blackmailing husband agrees a sum of US$27,000.
The detectives identify the couple but struggle to locate them. The best option is to intercept the suspect at the cash drop. Working alongside local police, the agency orchestrates a sting operation to recover the footage.
When they apprehend the suspect, however, they discover that the phone containing the footage is with his wife, somewhere else in the city.
It is only after her brother is brought in to persuade her to surrender that the footage is secured. The scandal does not become public. The businessman’s family may never know how close they had come to upheaval.
“If there’s any crisis at all (for victims of blackmail), it’s because we’re dealing with criminals,” says Naman. “We’re dealing with the dark secrets of people.”
FINDING OUT HARD TRUTHS
Not every difficult case, however, involves a crime. Some secrets are simply too painful to live with.
After 12 years of marriage, a housewife suspected that her husband was gay. He resisted intimacy, though in other respects, he was attentive — a devoted father who cared for the family. For years, she chose not to look too closely.
“But now I realise that I can’t live with this lie,” she tells a detective. “I have to end this marriage.”
To get custody of her daughter, she would need more than suspicion. She would need proof of infidelity.
The agency’s first attempt, with her consent, involves planting a listening device in the family car. But it captures nothing for two weeks.
So a male undercover agent, fitted with a hidden camera in his jacket, is brought into her husband’s orbit.
During one encounter, the husband can be heard to suggest a massage together and seen holding hands with the agent at a table. From the footage, the detectives conclude that the recordings will meet the legal threshold for establishing adultery.
What is evidence for the court is both heartbreak and peace of mind for the wife. “After 12 years of marriage, it’s very difficult for her to not only stay silent but also remain calm,” says Nidhi.
“She’s a very strong girl. She hasn’t disclosed anything, (not even) accidentally.”
In a society caught between following cultural traditions and one’s desires, “everyone is suffering from something or other in their lifetime”, observes Naman. “As you need doctors (and) lawyers in your lifetime, somehow you need detectives also.”
In matters of the heart, he adds, love is blind — with investigators like him providing surveillance when faith may be misplaced.
Watch the documentary, Love Auditors, here.
